If You Own Any of These Pets You May Be A Psychopath

What’s going on everybody, we’re back again with a random Big Brain Benny thought and I saw this tweet pop up on my timeline s/o @steeelerheart

It got me thinking and I couldn’t agree more, so I decided to list which pets makes you more of a psychopath:

• Snake: Why anyone would ever want a snake as a pet is beyond me. There are enough instances where your pet snake will eventually size you up to eat you. I don’t wanna hear any BS about garden snakes or any other kind, all snakes are fucked anyway you put it. @moonihere I could not have it said better myself brother.

• Tarantula: not to be confused with the Durantula (still the sickest unused nickname in the NBA) having a literal spider as a pet is crazy enough but this is a huge, hairy spider where you can see the thousands of eyes it has? Just go to therapy, no normal person has a tarantula

• Ferret: I’m not sure why anyone would go to the pet store when there are way more acceptable and normal pets to get but walk out with ferrets. Ferrets seem like they stink and sometimes they do look cute but you own a ferret as a pet you aren’t right in the head

• Birds: first off they are not real, minus the predator birds (eagle, Falcon, vulture, etc.) they are government drones, so you are just asking to be watched 24/7. On the other hand birds smell horrid and you look like a mental patient walking around with one

• Horse: horse girls, need I say more?

Now I’ll throw out some unorthodox pets that are completely acceptable to own especially if you had parents growing up that refused to get an actual pet

• Hermit Crab, (RIP Shelley) some hermit crabs can live up to 18 years so that’s pretty sweet

• Fish, fish are pretty chill just feed em' couple times a day and change the water and they vibe with you without giving you any responsibility

• Guinea Pig/Hamster, these little guys aren’t too bad but if they escape they will most likely die